"Attackers are strangers in dark alleys"
The image is vivid: a shadowy figure in a hoodie, lurking in a dark parking garage or alley, waiting to attack a random woman walking alone. It's the scene we see in movies, on the news, in our nightmares.
It's also statistically rare compared to where real danger comes from.
What the Data Actually Shows
- 80% of sexual assaults are committed by someone the victim knows. A friend, date, coworker, family member, or acquaintance — not a stranger.
- Most violence happens in familiar places. Homes, workplaces, parties, and other "safe" spaces — not alleys and parking garages.
- The most dangerous situations often feel normal. They start with charm, boundary testing, and social pressure — not overt threats.
- Stranger attacks, while real, are the minority. When they do happen, they're often preceded by observable warning signs.
The "stranger danger" narrative is dangerously incomplete.
When we only prepare for movie-style attacks, we miss the warning signs in situations that feel safe — where the real danger usually lives.
What This Means for Protection
Real protection includes boundaries with people you know.
- Recognize boundary testing. Small violations that escalate — pushing past "no," ignoring discomfort, testing limits
- Trust discomfort with "safe" people. Your gut doesn't care about someone's reputation
- Have exit strategies everywhere. Not just in dark alleys — at parties, in homes, at work
- Practice saying no without apologizing. Especially to people you know
- AND stay aware in unfamiliar environments. Stranger danger is real, just not the whole picture
This isn't about living in fear of everyone. It's about understanding that protection is a 360-degree skill — not just preparation for movie scenarios.
The woman who can set a boundary with a pushy coworker is building the same muscle she'd need with a stranger. Protection is protection.
Learn Complete Protection
Fierana teaches awareness, boundaries, and skills that work everywhere — with strangers AND with people you know.
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