You're walking to your car. Or through a parking garage. Or down a quiet street. And something feels off. Someone behind you. Someone who turned when you turned. Someone whose pace matches yours a little too closely.
Your heart rate spikes. Your mind races. And in that moment, most women freeze — not physically, but mentally. They don't know what to do. They've never been taught. They second-guess themselves: Am I being paranoid? What if I'm wrong? I don't want to make a scene.
This guide is for that moment. No panic. No paranoia. Just practical steps that actually work.
First: Trust What You're Feeling
Before we get to tactics, let's address the voice in your head that's already questioning whether this is real.
Your instincts exist for a reason. Women are neurologically wired for threat detection. That uneasy feeling isn't paranoia — it's your brain processing information faster than your conscious mind can articulate it. Maybe you noticed his reflection in a window. Maybe his footsteps changed rhythm. Maybe something about his attention felt directed rather than incidental.
You don't need to justify the feeling. You don't need to be certain. You just need to respond to it.
The cost of being wrong about danger is embarrassment. The cost of being wrong about safety is everything.
How to Confirm You're Being Followed
Before escalating, you can test your suspicion with a few subtle moves:
The Four-Turn Test
If you're walking, make four right turns (essentially a square). No one has a legitimate reason to follow you in a complete circle. If they're still behind you after four turns, you have confirmation.
The Pace Change
Slow down significantly or speed up. If they match your pace change, that's a red flag. Legitimate pedestrians maintain their own rhythm.
The Stop and Look
Stop walking. Turn around. Look directly at them. Check your phone, tie your shoe, look in a shop window — any excuse. A normal person will pass you. Someone following you will also stop, look away, or pretend to be occupied with something.
What to Do If It's Confirmed
1. Don't Go Home
This is the most important rule. If you're being followed, do not lead them to where you live. They may not know where you live yet. Don't give them that information.
2. Go Somewhere Public and Populated
Head toward:
- A busy store (grocery stores are ideal — they're well-lit, have multiple exits, and staff)
- A restaurant or coffee shop
- A fire station or police station
- Any business that's open
The goal is witnesses and help. Predators avoid audiences.
3. Call Someone
Call a friend, family member, or 911. Stay on the line. Describe what's happening, where you are, and what the person looks like. This does three things:
- Gets you help or backup
- Creates a record of what's happening
- Signals to the follower that you're aware and connected
If you feel you're in immediate danger, call 911. You don't need to be certain. You don't need to wait for them to do something. "I'm being followed and I'm scared" is enough.
4. Make Noise and Draw Attention
If they're closing distance and you can't get to safety:
- Yell. Not "help" (people often freeze at this) — yell something specific: "Call 911!" or "This man is following me!"
- Set off your car alarm if you're near your car
- Walk into traffic (carefully) — cars will stop, and you'll have witnesses
- Bang on doors or windows
5. Don't Confront Alone
It might be tempting to turn around and ask "Why are you following me?" Don't do this unless you're in a safe, public place with others around. Confrontation when you're alone and they have the advantage of proximity is high-risk.
If You're in a Vehicle
If you suspect a car is following you:
- Make four right turns (same principle as walking)
- Don't drive home
- Drive to a police station or fire station
- If you can't get there, pull into a busy, well-lit area and stay in your car with doors locked
- Call 911 and give them your location, your car's description, and theirs
- Honk your horn repeatedly to draw attention if they approach
After It's Over
Even if nothing "happened," take it seriously:
- Write down everything you remember — their description, what they were wearing, the time, location
- Tell someone what happened
- Consider filing a police report, even if they didn't do anything illegal. It creates a record
- Vary your routine for the next few weeks
The Bigger Picture
Being followed is rare. But the skills you use to handle it — awareness, decisiveness, trusting yourself, knowing where to go — are the same skills that keep you safe every day in smaller ways.
This is what we mean when we say protection is a system. It's not about one terrifying moment. It's about building the instincts, the judgment, and the confidence to handle whatever comes — before it escalates.
You already have those instincts. Now you have a plan to go with them.
Build Your Complete Protection System
This is one piece of the framework. Fierana teaches the complete system — from awareness to action — designed specifically for how women navigate the world.
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